Building the Essay Draft

Building the Essay Draft--Explanation

Development Options

Linking Paragraphs

Introductions

Conclusions

Revising and Proofreading the Draft

Hints for Revising and Proofreading

BUILDING THE ESSAY DRAFT-- EXPLANATION

Once you know what you want to talk about and you have written your THESIS statement, you are ready to build the body of your essay. The thesis statement will usually be followed by the body of the paper, the paragraphs that develop the thesis by explaining your ideas and backing them up with examples or evidence. This is, of course, the most important part of the paper, because you are giving your reader a clear idea of what you think and why you think it. (After you have completed the body of your paper, you can decide what you want to say in your introduction and in your conclusion.)

DEVELOPMENT OPTIONS

For each reason or main aspect you have to support your THESIS, remember to state your point clearly and explain it. One useful technique is to read your thesis sentence over and ask yourself what questions a reader might ask about it. Then answer those questions, explaining and giving examples or evidence.

Compare and contrast: show how one thing is similar to another, and then how the two are different--emphasizing the side that seems more important to you. For example, if your thesis states that "Jazz is a serious art form," you might compare and contrast a jazz composition to a classical one.

You may show your reader what the opposition thinks--that is, reasons why some people do not agree with your thesis--and then refute those reasons--show why they are wrong. On the other hand, if you feel that the opposition isn't entirely wrong, you may say so, that is, concede, but then explain why your thesis is still the right opinion.

Think about the order in which you have made your points. Why have you presented a certain reason or main aspect that develops your thesis first, another second, etc.? If you can't see any particular value in presenting your points in the order you have, think about it some more, until you decide why the order you have is best, or else decide to change the order to one that makes more sense to you.

Finally, as you build the body of your paper, keep revisiting your thesis with three questions in mind. First, does each paragraph develop my thesis? Second, have I done all the development I wish had been done? Third, and most important, am I still satisfied with my working thesis, or have I developed my body in ways that mean I must adjust my thesis to fit what I have learned, what I believe, and what I have actually discussed?

LINKING PARAGRAPHS

Remember that you are the driver, and your readers are along for the ride. You don't want to make any sudden turns that will confuse your readers, annoy them, or distract them for a moment because they need to "get their bearings." That's why it's important to link your paragraphs together, giving your readers cues so that they see the relationship between one idea and the next, and how these ideas develop your thesis. Your goal is a smooth transition, a smooth movement from paragraph A to paragraph B, which explains why cue words that link paragraphs are often called transitions. (Still, your link between paragraphs may not be one word, but several, or even a whole sentence.)

Here are some ways of linking paragraphs:

To show simply that another idea is coming: also, moreover, in addition

To show that the next idea is the logical result of the previous one: therefore, consequently, thus, as a result

To show that the next idea seems to go against the previous one, or is not its logical result: however, nevertheless, still

A grab-bag of other choices for "special occasions": most importantly (to show you've come to your strongest point), on the other hand (to show a change in topic), finally (your final point, of course)

INTRODUCTIONS

The first thing to remember about your introduction is--it doesn't have to be the first thing--the first thing that you write, that is. After you have brainstormed and come up with a thesis and developed it in the body of your paper, then you can decide how to introduce your ideas to your reader. There can be a thousand introductions to the same paper--each designed to establish rapport with a different kind of reader.

The goals of an introduction are to:

get your reader's attention / arouse your reader's curiosity
provide any necessary background information before you state your thesis (often the last sentence of the introductory paragraph)
establish why you are writing the paper. You already know why you are writing, and who your reader is; now present that reason for writing to that reader.

Hints for writing your introduction:

Use the W's of journalism to decide what information to give: who, what, when, where. Remember that a history teacher doesn't need to be told "George Washington was the first president of the United States"--keep your reader in mind.
Add another W--why--as in "Why is this paper worth reading?" The answer could be that your topic is new, or controversial, or very important.
Catch your reader by surprise by starting with a description or narrative that doesn't hint at what your thesis will be. For example, a paper could start, "It is less than a 32nd of an inch long, but it can kill an adult human," to begin a paper about eliminating malaria-carrying mosquitoes.

CONCLUSIONS

There can be many different conclusions to the same paper (just as there can be many introductions), depending on who your readers are and where you want to direct them, what follow-up you expect of them after they finish your paper. Therefore, re-stating your thesis and summarizing the main points of your body should not be all that your conclusion does. In fact, most weak conclusions are merely re-statements of the thesis and summaries of the body without guiding the reader toward thinking about the implications of the thesis.

Here are some options for writing a strong conclusion:

Make a prediction about the future. Sure, you convinced us that thermal energy is terrific, but do you think it will become the standard energy source? When?
Give specific advice. If your readers now understand that multi-cultural education has great advantages (or disadvantages, or both--whatever your opinion might be), what should they do? Whom should they contact?
Put your topic in a larger context. Once you have proven that physical education should be part of every school's curriculum, perhaps we should consider other "frill" courses which are actually essential.
A final, important reminder: just as a conclusion should not be just a re-statement of your thesis and summary of your body, it should also not be an entirely new topic, a door opened that you barely lead your reader through and leave them there lost. Just as in finding your topic and in forming your thesis, the safe and sane rule in writing a conclusion is, neither too little nor too much.

REVISING AND PROOFREADING

What is revising?

Writing is only half the job of writing. What's the answer to this riddle? Well, the writing process begins even before you put pen to paper. And, once you finish actually writing, the process continues. What you have written is not the finished essay, but a first draft--and, as you go over it each time to improve it, a second draft, third draft, as many as necessary to do the job right. Your final draft, edited and proofread, is your essay, ready for your reader's eyes.

Remember, though, that revision of an essay is not simply proofreading. Proofreading is checking over a draft to make sure that everything is complete and correct as far as spelling, grammar, sentence structure, punctuation, and such matters go; it's a necessary, if somewhat tedious and tricky job, one that a friend could help you with--even if that friend is a "Spellcheck" on a computer. No machine can help you with true revision, however, nor would you want it to--a re-vision of your essay, how you see things now, deciding whether your thesis and body, and also your introduction and conclusion, really express your vision.

Revision is global, taking another look at what ideas you have included in your paper and how they are arranged; proofreading is polishing, one spot at a time. That's why revision should come before proofreading: why polish what you might be changing anyway?

HINTS FOR REVISING AND PROOFREADING

Leave some time--an hour, a day, several days--between writing and revising. You need some distance to switch from writer to editor, some distance between your initial vision and your re-vision.
Double check your writing assignment to be sure you haven't gone off course. It's all right if you've shifted from your original plan--if you know why you did and are happier this way.
Read aloud, and slowly. You need to get your eye and your ear to work together: at each point that something seems "funny," read it over again; if you're not sure what's wrong, or even if something's wrong, make a notation in the margin and come back to it later. Watch out for "padding." Tighten your sentences to eliminate excess words that dilute your ideas. Also be on the lookout for points that seem vague or incomplete; these could be wonderful opportunities for rethinking, clarifying, and further developing an idea.
Get to know what your particular quirks are as a writer--every writer has them! Do you give examples without explaining them, or forget links between paragraphs? Leave an extra re-reading or two just for your personal "favorites."
Get someone else into the act! Have others read your draft, or read it to them. Invite questions, and ask questions yourself, to see if your points are clear and well-developed. Remember, though, that some well-meaning "amateurs," including spouses, can be too easy--or too hard--on a piece of writing, especially one by someone close. Never change anything unless you are convinced that it should be changed.
Keep tools at hand, such as a dictionary, a thesaurus, and a writing handbook. Use them!
If you're using word processing, remember that computers are wonderful resources for editing and revising.
When you feel you've done everything you can, first by revising and then by proofreading, and have a nice clean final draft, put it aside and return later to re-see the whole essay. There may be some last minute fine tuning that can make all the difference.

Next Step

Building the Essay Draft